Isellta frowned. “I’m not sure what that means.”
Jay chuckled. “It means we’re both willing to claim blame for things that aren’t our fault.”
“Even though it feels like it’s our fault?”
“Oh.” Isellta flinched as their combined hands traveled too far north. His free hand involuntarily clutched the blanket.
Jay stopped. “You okay?”
“Ngh.” He nodded.
“Isellta. Do I need to stop? Do you want me to stop?”
If I tell him yes, he’ll get mad at me. I don’t want him to get mad at me. But he isn’t Her Majesty. He understands me. He cares about me. He doesn’t want to hurt me. He wants me to have a choice in what he does to me.
It’s my choice.
If I make it, he won’t be mad at me. He won’t yell at me. He won’t grab me and hurt me and twist me and make me scream.
Jay isn’t like that.
Isellta clenched and unclenched the blanket. “If we could start moving downwards, that would be nice.”
Jay didn’t question it. He nodded and let him move their hands away from that region. He carefully watched Isellta’s expression.
“It’s okay. You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m okay, Jay.”
Jay’s shoulders relaxed.
Someone knocked on the door.
“Who is it?” Jay called out.
“Two bar mitzvahed moose who vamoosed.” Maelin replied. “May I come in?”
Isellta clutched the blanket again.
“No, not yet.”
“Jay? If you need to talk to her, go talk to her.” Isellta smiled at him. “I’m okay.”
“Okay.” Jay covered Isellta’s lower half with the blanket. “I’ll be right back.”
Isellta watched him hurry over to the door and answer it.
Jay looked back at him, stepped into the hall, and closed the door.
Isellta sighed and carefully laid down. He looked up at the ceiling.
He curled his hand above his breastbone.
Robin, I know you’re here. Please. Please talk to me. Tell me why you aren’t here with me. Tell me where you are.
He stretched his unoccupied arm to the ceiling.
Tell me how I can find you. Robin. Robin, I’m here. I’m right here.
He flared out his fingers.
Please. Just say my name so I know you’re alive.
My beautiful Robin.
Say my name.
‘sellta? Can you e’en hear me?
I’m right here in this darn dank dungeon cell. I ain’t so sure you can hear me. But, if you can, I’m here. Come find me.
Robin watched the cell door and waited, listening.
But there was just silence.
He closed his eyes and tried again.
Can either you hear me? If you can, call me.
I’m so alone.
His eyes teared up.
Talk to me. I’m trapped. I’m scared. Ain’t so sure what’s gonna happen to me this time around. Don’t know if Olessa’s gonna get to torturin’ me again. Don’t know if they’re gonna just leave me here to go nuts.
Am’rose, don’t leave me here alone.
I ain’t sure what I want you to do. Sure I’d love it like mad if you all came here to rescue me. That’ld be awesome as all heckin’ get go. But I ain’t wantin’ you to get captured like me.
Am’rose, call me. Let me hear your stupid voice again. Let me know that someone out there cares ’bout me.
I feel so alone.
His tears ran down his skin, down the metal holding his mouth shut.