Part 948 – Indecision

Isellta.

“mm?” Isellta opened his eyes and raised his head. “Robin?” he whispered.

He sat up and glanced around.

Robin was nowhere in sight.

He flattened his wings against his back.

It must have been a dream.

Unless.

What if he’s trying to contact me?

What if?

He sat up straighter.

The monitors!

He scrambled out of bed and ran to the door. He stopped and looked back at Jay, who was sound asleep in the rocker.

I shouldn’t go alone.

The monsters might grab me again.

Her Majesty might…

He walked over to Jay and hesitated.

But I don’t want to wake him up. He’s had a busy day.

Isellta lowered his hand.

I’ll let him sleep.

He returned to his bed.

***

Robin sighed. What am I doin’? He ain’t gonna show up. Even if he does, it don’t matter. I ain’t there with him.

I wanna be there with him.

He stood and looked over the monitors one last time.

No sign of Isellta anywhere.

His mouth twitched into an unhappy smile. “Yeah. I thought that would happen.”

***

Isellta hugged his pillow.

What if he’s there waiting for me?

***

Robin waited.

Maybe.

***

But no.

That Robin was only a dream.

Robin.

The real Robin is brash and mean.

And he doesn’t love me.

Isellta hugged his pillow tighter.

He hates me.

He pulled my hair.

He said.

***

Robin leaned back in the chair and stared up at the ceiling. I’m just wastin’ my time. He ain’t gonna show up.

He ain’t the Isellta I love.

He’s that jerk of a fey.

He called me damaged.

He implied there ain’t anyone who can love me.

Maybe he’s right.

Who’d want loud-mouthed, scarred up me?

Not someone as lovely as Isellta.

He stood and paced the room.

I’m damaged.

I’m broken.

Isellta don’t love me.

I should just go home.

***

He said that he never loved me.

Isellta pressed his face into the pillow.

Is that possible?

What about those times I saw him on the monitors?

That was not hate in his eyes.

What if?

***

The Isellta I love don’t exist.

It’s all been a lie and fey mind games.

***

What if all of those times were lies?

Does Robin even know how to lie like that?

***

Robin walked away from the monitors and headed towards the open doorway.

***

Isellta closed his eyes.

***

Robin looked back one last time.

No Isellta.

Maybe I should stay a little longer.

***

Isellta opened his eyes.

Maybe I should go check.

I could run over there and check really quick.

***

Maybe he’ll wake up to do a bathroom run or somethin’.

***

But Her Majesty will find me.

She’ll catch me and pin me down.

Maelin isn’t here to protect me.

And Jay is sound asleep.

***

Robin watched the monitors.

Come on, Isellta.

Come oooonn.

***

Isellta got out of bed and walked over to the rocker. “Jay?” He gently laid his hand on the guard’s arm.

“Nnngh.”

“Jay. Please wake up.”

Jay opened his eyes. “Wha…Isellta? What’s wrong?”

“I need to go to the control room. Could you please come with me?”

“Sure.”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s