“Well, gee.” said Robin. “Ain’t ev’rythin’ all hunky-dory all a sudden. I’m gonna go get me some fresh air.” He grabbed Antioch by his shirt front. “You hurt my friends, I’ll hurt you.” He bared his fangs. “You get me?”
Antioch smiled gently. It was almost genuine. “You and I are so alike. You have my eyes. Their shape. Their color. But you have your mother’s nose and mouth.”
“Wrong! I got my dad’s eyes. You ain’t my dad. So, don’t even pretend.” He released him. “I’ll be back in a bit, Raven. Don’t get yourself staked or locked up or shipped to Zimbabwe or somethin’ stupid like that.”
Robin pushed Antioch out of his way and left the room.
Robin walked down the hall. His thoughts were twisted into knots.
But one thought stood alone.
He went down to the first floor.
I don’t get it.
I thought he cared about me. I thought I meant somethin’ to him. Was I wrong?
He entered the control room and sat down in the empty chair.
He sure wasn’t bein’ forced into it. That’s for freakin’ sure.
He looked up at the cracked monitor.
I thought he loved me.
How could I be so stupid?
How could I be so stupid and wrong?
He’s just a fey.
He don’t even know what love is.
Isellta lay on his side, facing away from Preyuna. She slept, facing away from him.
He bit his lower lip and tried to get his shaky breathing under control.
I wish she’d turn to me and touch me and tell me that it’s all right. I wish she’d tell me that these things do happen and it’s fine.
I want someone to hold me and tell me that I’m fine.
Even though I’m not.
I’m a mess.
I’m a disaster.
I’m useless and I can’t do anything right.
I can’t make anyone happy.
Not even my Queen.
He hugged his pillow.
He closed his eyes and imagined Robin holding him.
His tears saturated his pillow.
He waited for her to say something. Anything.
Preyuna sat up and stretched.
She’s going to speak. She’s going to reassure me.
She got out of bed.
Maybe she’ll pat my back.
She put her clothes on.
Maybe she’ll thank me for trying my best.
She walked towards the door.
He sat up. “Your Majesty. Please wait.”
She turned to face him.
He released his pillow. “One more time?”
“I gave you plenty of one more times, Isellta. There’s no sense in trying again.”
“But maybe this time—”
“Good night, Isellta.”
His shoulders slumped.
She left the room.